I looked up the biblical meaning of three and it did not disappoint. It’s the number of harmony, three accord (strength), three is for eternal life and the resurrection on the third day.
The 2nd season of Accidental Hope exceeded all expectations with guests and incredible stories. The goal was to find stories of overcoming, beauty from ashes, purpose from pain…and hopefully make some friends along the way.
My dear friend Audrey Fulton, a tragic accident may have brought us together but God has connected us in so many other levels. She is a mother of four and her strength and faith are rare. The Fulton’s prove vows matter and marriage can handle anything when God is at the center.
I talked with Dr. Maryann Gray, a pioneer of hope for C.A.D.I.s , she shared stages of grief and her journey of accepting. It was such an honor to meet her and now I consider her a friend.
Darin Strauss, author of Half A Life reminded me the power and freedom of sharing your story. I was so nervous and Darin’s down to earth spirit eased those nerves almost instantly.
We heard from a world-wide evangelist with his struggle in faith (Jay Lowder), a sexual assault survivor advocate (Lavinia Masters) , families who started foundations to honor loved ones, two best friends that literally experienced the most heartbreaking loss and God got the glory. I literally could not pick a favorite episode because they each mean the world to me, my only hope is that they connect to someone else who needed to know it will be okay.
We heard from many moms including my own and how motherhood and tragedy come together, there is grace, fortitude, and inspiration.
Season 2 had something for everyone, an artist and entrepreneur, different types of trauma including racial injustice, living organ donation, battling cancer and daily devotions with Tera Elness.
I don’t have a Word for this year, a vision board, or a prominent goal. No hustle, no BS, just one step forward each day learning and growing and seeking deeper connections with people and faith. I don’t have a plan or an outline or expectations of the season to come but my heart is open and I am ready to receive what may come.
There are many lessons to be grateful for from living through a global pandemic. I hope 2020 taught you, you are stronger than you can imagine, we can pivot when least expecting and triumph when facing utter chaos. The world went upside down, but we are still here and I am grateful!
May God bless whoever finds this little blog!
Courage is the most important of all virtues, because without courage, you cannot practice any of the other virtues consistently.” ~Maya Angelou
Maya is one of the greatest souls to ever walk this earth, I had the privilege to see her read poetry in Dallas many years ago. I giddy in a packed room listening to every lingering word that she spoke. She had a presence about her and a different pace in how she articulated that set her apart. In her lifetime she shared many amazing and painful events in her life. Her transparency is only one aspect of her tremendous courage. I can’t begin to imagine the tasks she tackled and triumphed personally and professionally. For damn certain she was called, equipped and she did it scared!
I know why the caged bird sings…
When you are locked in your head and trapped inside yourself you feel like a caged bird. I didn’t know how good it would feel to release my truth into the world until I did it. I was terrified but I realized letting in free nothing had power anymore. No one could hurt me worse than I felt and so I literally had nothing to lose.
I responded to a project found on Accidental Impacts for a journalist from The New Yorker. Out of the thousands that could have been chosen, Alice Gregory selected a few for her research. From the floor of my closet I spilled my heartbreak, regret and bad words to a complete stranger. When I gave every detail, fear and frustration about “the accident” I felt a weight was lifted. I felt slightly freer.
Followed by crazy anxiety that maybe my details crossed a line or perhaps this would become a big mess, but to this day I do not regret sharing my truth with the world and being a small voice of an emerging community calling out from the shadows of guilt and shame.
Link to the full article here.
Link to episode where I follow up with Alice. Episode Season 1 Episode 18.
The second crazy thing I did that started this whole crazy ride was another project, a new podcast concept called “What Was That Like.”
Again I did something I have never done before and I was so very scared to show my wounds to the world because at that time they weren’t scars. I had not even felt the reality of the first anniversary. But keeping it in was also destroying me, so I did it scared.
I didn’t realize that speaking out would help me find a community that has blessed my life incredibly. I am thankful for every sacred story shared with me and the pain that bonds us. I care deeply for complete strangers from all over the world. I am grateful. Humbled. These “projects” were catalysts for a calling God was calling out in me.
May he equip you with all you need for doing his will. May he produce in you, through the power of Jesus Christ, every good thing that is pleasing to him. All glory to him forever and ever! Amen
The why I had an accident involving fatality will drive you bananas! I would say the questions of which there are no answers can drive you bat-@!#* crazy!🙊 There isn’t a good “why” so I focus on “what now?”
The why I share openly my heart and experience, that list is simple.
LOVE ❤️ Link to Inaugural Episode
I love God who created me, who hears me, who goes before me and weaves a tapestry of life I am blessed to journey! That does not exclude the bad, ugly and heartbroken events on this journey. I share how my hope in Jesus and belief that my sins are forgiven because of work on the cross by my Savior. I share His love because it is for all and covers all.
I love my family and friends who challenge me and support me despite my flaws! Documenting my feelings is a place I can keep my thoughts so that people love me can walk this journey with me.
I also share so those that have traveled this awfully lonely path do not feel alone. I have a deep empathy and reservoir of love to give those that are hurting, those that walk this road as an accidental killer (CADI).
“Meet me on the bridge from heartbreak of the soul and path to healing” `Unknown
I think a lot on the topics of love and grief. Sometimes I feel they are polar opposites but yet they are connected. We grieve because we love.
***Change in subject 🤪
I have always been drawn to the life of Moses. Possibly because Katy and Haven always wanted to hear “the baby Moses” story from their children’s bible. Over and over again.
There is connection there, he was raised in unique circumstances.
He was an accidental killer
He was timid but obedient
***another change in subject stay with me***🤣
When we were in Washington DC at the Bible Museum ( worth the visit I promise!) there is an interactive walk through of Moses life. So moving, very well done!
I had an ah-ha moment.
What broke Pharaoh’s spirit…grief. What gave Moses the courage to do and say and act as he did…love for God and God’s People!
Moses saw his community (Jews) hurting and it stirred him driven by love. He also made mistakes driven by that same powerful emotion. 🔥
I get stirred up for my people, but it’s driven by love. I make mistakes but it’s rooted in that same place. There is so much value in community! When you have a support system treasure it! Protect it! Be willing to part the seas, trudge mountains and wander deserts for it! 🙌🏻
You are loved! You are worthy of love, BIG love, you have a chance to change your world! You have experienced earth-shattering pain and still breathing. Your healing is a gift! 🙌🏻 The acceptance of this means love wins, the accident did not defeat you!!You have overcome, so walk in that light not worried of what the world thinks of you because you know you are a survivor! Now find your why and live it to the best of your ability! Let questions that can’t be answered fall off your weary shoulders, embrace healing and go spread some love!
Love big and boldly!